Excerpts from Celebrating Single and getting love right.....on codependent toxic relationships and how to change your choices or make better ones in the future....RED FLAG EXAMPLES.....
" It's a red flag when dates tell you terrible stories about their ex-wives or girlfriends and take no responsibility for their role in the failure of the relationship." Jane, 46
" A classic red flag for me is lying. If a lie is done to protect someone's feelings, it's a social grace. If it's a profound lie and digs into the fundamental basis of your relationship, it's unforgivable. I hate being betrayed." Vince, 43
" I think it's important that a man I meet love his parents. (Not too much though). Because someone who loves his parents is able to love you. It's a danger signal to me if a man doesn't have any friends and doesn't get along with his family." Rebecca, 39
"Look at people's relationships with others in their lives. Who are that person's friends and family? Are they close to their siblings or parents? I'm close to a lot of people. I've stayed in touch with friends from a long time ago." Ken, 39
" My problem is becoming involved with men who are not emotionally available, when there's no getting a committment of any type. The red flag has two parts. The first is the guy's part, if he's evasive about the future. And the second part is my being sensitive to the avoidance because I want that guarantee or certainty of the future before I invest myself in the relationship. I have to be constantly aware of my goal:
To be in a healthy, lasting relationship." Patty, 35
"I've been in a relationship where the sex was great and the relationship was very bad. The woman was into drugs and things I never did. Her attitude was, there was a guy around every post. I was one in a chain of people. The excitement drew me into it. In every one of my relationships, I can look back and say, "I knew there was a problem." Ray, 50
The list goes on.....just be AWARE when you meet someone and LISTEN to everything they say. I have a mind like a steel trap...I never forget anything that is said or done.
Then listen to everything they DON'T SAY!!!!
Love and Peace
Relationship Detective
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