Sunday, January 6, 2008

A Good Night's Sleep Finally

Thank the lord for medication. Yesterday was a bad day but my girlfriend Carol stopped to visit and munch and we surfed the RE sites for both of us. Her in VT and me in AZ/NM. I found quite a few tasty homes in Cottonwood just south of Sedona. I guess if my home sells I will put things in storage and drive out there and have a look see. Give the dog to the family for a bit. I could get another larger home w/a tub in VT but then I would be not exploring anything new. It is my roommates last day here and the TV is on. It's hard to blog w/the TV on. I just made sausage and scrambled eggs w/scallions and cheese and shared mine w/my dog. He has been revolting against his morning yogurt since AI started giving him the turkey in the freezer(injected). I'd like to mention a loss. A dog name Sheba was lost a month ago to a football sized tumor at the ripe old age of 15. She was a hairy smelly dog but much loved. A black lab mix. It was time for her to go. I will try to find a pic. Today is gloomy but warm. It's 1pm and I am tempted to be lazy but my boss Carol says I gotta walk or snowshoe to start losing weight. The zyprexa and weight have made me lethargic. I'm also digesting. It is scary to leave my home alone for parts unknown. I'm not used to crime. Bad eggz. My roommate wants to go with me but he is far too negative for me. A friend was going to take him in but changed his mind for the same reason.
I'm trying to heal my tummy and lose weight so I've quit the "sauce" for awhile and am on atkins. Modified. I had butternut squash w/mild and honey to calm my belly w/a little vanilla bean ice cream the renters had left yesterday. They took my flannel pillow case that went w/a set I got for my wedding I never used. I'm kinda pissed....they must have taken a pillow or barfed on the case....I dunno. I emailed them but no response. I don't own much but that set was paisley blue flannel and it needs its pillow case. I keep looking outside and it seems so gloomy.
Maybe its me thats gloomy? I miss things. People. Excitement. Love. Massage. TLC. Live Music. I'm too embarrassed about my weight to go out. A bra is too squishy. It feels uncomfortable an you can't just have your boobs fly all over. Untamed. I have an edge of depression which is most likely anger and frustration at the weight and the roommate situation. I have someone new moving in Monday pm at 7 and the old one out into the cold in the am. The state is not helping much with the situation and I've taken it on as my problem as usual as if I didn't have enough of my own. A friend said it was all distracting me from my liffe and it is true but it can't be helped I wont abandon anyone. In the cold. People should be able to find their own way however. I don't want to be an enabler. Back to the hospital with him if there is no motel being paid for. I just left a message for one of his discharge counsellors. Again. Also at Rutland Mental Health. Codependent me. I just wont be able to live with myself unless I find him a warm bed.
I feel bad for homeless people. I am very fortunate to have my own home (for now). I am sooo scared to sell and lose my home but I can't keep up w/the mowing and don't like living on the main hwy anymore. But the flip side is living w/smoke in the air, pesticides and people who are slobs. You never know what you are going to find in other parts of the country. I have narrowed down my search to Cottonwood-Sedona, AZ......Tucson, AZ area and Silver City, NM. I really loved Sedona so Cottonwood seems good as there will be some snow but not like here. It will also be cooler for the dog. I wish I had a copilot w/income to go out there. Maybe buddha will send me one.
Have A Great Day Bloggers.....
Sun Yat Zen

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