Is He Witty Or Pretty or Gay?

I have made all the food and won a few pool games. I made guacamole and chips, boiled shrimp w/sauce, artichoke cheese pie, veggie platter and dip, devilish eggs, cookies and candies....crispy chicken strips w/dip......the guests have not arrived as of yet. I hear there is a man single who I might be interested in? Who knows? I'm am sooo picky. Mom and dad are here(Jackies parents) and we are playing pool and scrabble. My bro is hot.....I am having my last vodka sodas fer awhile. The snowballs are in a hiding spot as the dogs are trying to scoff up the fewd. Today one of them got my biteplate w/my two teeth and had a ball.....luckily it is OK. I may have to stay a day longer as my meds did not come. Louann Barton is singing on the DVD player. I am anxious to shoot more pool. Practice makes perfect. Nothing I wash is good enough for a Taurus so I have given up trying. I wash them twice and then let it sit.
Have a Happy NYRS Eve Kiddies......
Love Sunamizen

A Waste Of Thyme

A friend recently posted that spending time with a certain person had been a waste of time. I strongly disagree and look at these "failed relationships" as lessons. The things I learn from each person are invaluable and may not be fully appreciated until sometime later on. Time is an illusion therefore we cannot waste it. I have learned a lot about people that lie in the past few years and how they do it over and over with no conception that the other person is "on to them."
I have learned a lot about myself and how I have expectations and am often disappointed by people. I don't like to be out of control anymore and I have cut way down on my drinking to maybe a glass a night. My family does not drink much so being around sober people helps. Why do we drink? Perhaps to calm unease, frustration, anger, out-of-habit, oral fixation, addiction.
Since I quit vodka my tummy is better and my eye bags are gone. The poison is in the elixir I have heard. I still enjoy my java. I watched a cute Disney movie last night called Ratitouille. It was about a rat chef and it was done well. We had white pizza pie with broccoli and ice cream.
Today is the day to prepare appetizers for the guests. I shall do this. Guacamole, artichoke pie, chicken wings and a veggie platter. Some dip. It will be hard to stay awake til midnight as I am not quite the night owl I used to be. My brother and I are starting our diets tommorrow sort of as a race to see who can do it. It just seemed like my departure on 1/1 and a new year was a good start date. I know how to do the diet better and have more time to prepare the food. I also go to the gym and he does not. There is an atkins website though that he can read. The snow has fallen again and luckily my boot is being fixed-I cut the suede shoveling my mom's walkway.
Here's to 2008.....hopefully a year full of good health and love and especially peace.
A year to get fit again and pay off debt......
Sunami-zen

Rarely Is Anything Said That Stimulates My Brain

It all seems so trivial, mundane and superficial. Tolle says that power over others is weakness disguised as strength. True power is within. Anyone identifying with their mind will have fear as their constant companion, which means most people. Fear of the future being anxiety or dread. In the egos search for wholeness we often search for completion in a mate, things....ego-gratification. This is unconscious. The conscious emotional pain is one I feel often and that would be the feeling of not being worthy or good enough. I once wrote a song called Enough is enough.
In the first case you cannot feel fulfilled or at peace except for brief intervals when you got what you wanted. In the end it is all relinquished so finding identity in "things" is not gonna get you anywhere. This past summer I gave many things away. I had nothing without my health and I knew it. I occupied my time with sorting and giving away to the less fortunate. This lightened my load. True I still want things but I am patient for them to come to me. Drums for instance.
A love to call my own. Inner peas. Being present in the now is better than the idea that religious fanatics have that believe in a future heaven because this belief creates a present hell. They are always craving what they don't have until they die. Time is also a dangerous thing as time is just an illusion. You only have Right Now. The sense of wonder is attained only in the now. There are few people I enjoy spending time with or talking with. Those people that I do enjoy stimulate my mind to grow. The mind itself is not dangerous it is the actions taken as a result of a mixed up mind. Mind your own mind a friend had created as a bumper sticker. Keep your mind within its boundaries. Tame it to behave. Dwell in the present not the past or the future. I often find myself daydreaming about the future. Exploring new places to live with more sun and better weather. It leaves me depressed and dissatisfied with my present. It's OK to just Do It..move..relocate. Just know you will have the same problems unless you make other changes.
Are you always trying to get somewhere other than where you are? Is most of your doing a means to an end? Are you waiting for something like things or a special person to give meaning to your life? It's knot gonna happen. You must be happy alone. Happy without stuff.
Of course I find myself yearning for a relationship that "works" as we all do. But I would rather live alone than be in a bad relationship. I'm stuck a bit after failing and gaining weight. Watching others relate. Watching people married for years bicker yet remain ensconced. Is it out of fear?Love? Duty? Obligation? I do not know nor will I ever. Will I ever take the chance and try to love again? I don't know that either. I need to be cozy in my own skin. Happy with my own life. Right now I crave a warm desert climate. I always have but fear has kept me in Vermont. Fear of the unknown. I want a copilot to go with me. A team is always nicer than alone.
Mayhaps it will happen but until then I will rent my home to strangers to get out of debt.
Thank you Eckhart Tolle for being a teacher. When I find my mind wandering and talking incessantly I thank you for making me aware of it.
Much Love and peace....
Sunami-whitepizza-zen

Fish Out Of Water

I feel a little bit like that. I'm swimming but going nowhere. Treading water I suppose. I miss home and the gym and my best friend Carol. Tommorrow people are coming over so I can make myself useful by preparing artichoke pie and guacamole. It's cold here in the house....they don't use the heat much so I'm always wearing a lot of clothes. I don't feel relaxed enough to read so we watch TV a lot. We got twinkies and ho-hos to eat treats before the big bad diet starts 1/1.
We had my meatloaf and smashed garlic potatoes and shrimp last night. Tonight i don't know?
Watched a movie w/Kevin Costner and Wm Hurt (Blurt) called Mr Brooks. Have to watch it again it was a bit confusing. Moider. I want to get home to make sure my house is OK-renters there. Check on Victor. Get cooking at the gym. Do some snowshoeing if the sun ever comes out in the N.E. It rarely does. I'm still looking to swap for 6 months next winter. I'm going to rent my home as much as I can this winter and stay at a motel next door. I can charge $150PN and pay $45 at the motel and make a profit. Don't know why I never thought of that......
Here's to another restful day doing nothing.......
I feel like I should accomplish something so I'm doing my laundry and we will take the dogs for a run. Burn off the twinkies.
Nothng prolific. Need to be in my element.
Abracadabra

Time Flies

Time certainly flies away from home. It is already the 29th! The people at my home are having fun and there are no problems. I feel relieved. I am staying with a Leo and a Taurus and i find that the Taurus has to do everything I do over. I wash a dish-it gets rewashed..I vacuum-it gets revacuumed. Phew.....I'm a housekeeper but I'm not fanatical anymore. Illness will do that...put you in your place. Make you understand what is important and what is knot. I owe an apology to Eric for overreacting due to heavy drinking when we were last together. I miss him very much. He knows that. I could strangle him sometimes but I still love him. The last relationship I had I thought was the One. The sex was from another planet but he didn't know how to hold my hand.
He didnt know how to be a best friend guy. Do the things women crave like massage, dishes, home cooked meals, talking for hours, making music together. Giving unselfishly outside the bedroom. I now know that the infatuation was strong but the relationship was doomed.
I am getting healthier by the day. I can't wait til spring comes. Seeing the flowers pop up out of the ground. Hopefully I'll be able to figure out how to use my new camera by then. It is 3:20 in the afternoon and my brother will be home soon to go to return some presents. I'm ready for a Dunkin Donuts cappucino. They want to control my intake of coffee and booze.....they say I drink too much coffee. So does my mom. I'm very ORAL. Gotta have something in my mouth at all times. Get your mind out of the gutter......
Have A Day and Miss Me A Little.....
Lubb....
Tubba Lard

Yesterday Was A Great Day

I had the whole day to myself...slept late, felt good, made coffee and breakfast...emailed and blogged....made dinner for my family....we watched TV and ate pie and ice cream(the pre-induction phase of the Atkins Diet). I figure we eat everything we wont be able to have after 1/1 now and that seemed to work for everyone. Watched Ice Age....Nova....A Scary Movie.
Today I am here wondering what is up for this afternoon. I shoveled snow for my mom and the shovel broke a hole in my leather boot so we may drop that off to be fixed-suede UGG boot.
Five mo days til I'm home and can resume the gym and snowshoeing. Angus is being a very good boy. I stopped drinking vodka as it was giving me eye bags. White wine occasionally.
Anxiety makes me drink. I was a bit anxious at the start of the visit but not now. It's always hard to reside in someones home. We are trying to find an assisted living apt for my mom but the rent is outrageous-$2725 mo. Veterans association can kick in but because she got remarried and he died in 90 instead of 89 she is disqualified. Makes no sense at all. My dad was a veteran of WWII. She should be compensated. Can't fight the system Buford. Would like to pick up a copy of Man In The Moon with Jim Carrey where he portrays Andy Kaufman. Saw a snippet.
Well to the shower and who knows today? Gotta throw together a meatloaf for dinner.
Smashed potatoes w/garlic already made and leftover peas and shrimp.
Need to get some exercise and the pharmacy in Rutvegas is sending my meds. Hope it gets here on monday.
Namaste
Sunami-zen

Non-Violence Is More Powerful Than Violence

Sum Silly Yolks On Getting Old

The first is my favorite.........

A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office;
"Is it true," she wanted to know,"that the medication you prescribed
has to be taken for the rest of my life?"
"Yes, I'm afraid so," the doctor told her.
There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied,
"I'm wondering, then, just how serious is my condition
because this prescription is marked 'NO REFILLS.'"

An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery
and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation.
As he was about to get the anesthesia he asked to speak to his son.
"Yes, Dad, what is it?"
"Don't be nervous, son; do your best and just remember,
if it doesn't go well, if something happens to me, your mother is going to come
and live with you and your wife...."

Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way.
I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young. Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
First you forget names, then you forget faces.Then you forget to pull up your zipper.
(It's worse when you forget to pull it down.)
Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft.
Today, it's called golf.
Two old guys are pushing their carts around Wal-Mart when they collide.
The first old guy says to the second guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for mywife,
and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."
The second old guy says, "That's OK, It's a coincidence. I'm looking for my wife, too.
I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate."
The first old guy says, "Well, maybe I can help you find her. What does she look like?"
The second old guy says: "Well, she is 27 yrs old! , tall, with red hair, blue eyes, long legs,
and is wearing short shorts.
What does you wife look like?"
To which the first old guy says, "Doesn't matter, let's look for yours."
Lord, Keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth...AMEN..!!

There's No Place Like Om

I have been staying with relatives for about five days now with five more to go. It is really hard to live in someone elses' home with their rules and comments. It is hard when you are hiking to crave silence yet have a person yammering on and on non-stop. When I hike I don't speak I just enjoy the silence. I went off my diet due to circumstances and am back on today. No reason to wait til 1/1. I miss being able to go to the gym. I will be there a lot after I return and clean the 3 houses the week of the first. I feel a bit "out of place" here as I am used to being alone. This morning was the first morning I am alone all day and I love it. I feel like I can breathe. I love my family but my sister-in-law loves to shop and talks incessantly. My brother makes snide comments that hurt. His judgement and criticism shows a lack of self-awareness. I will not take anything personally. I had to try on bras yesterday and the full length mirror did me in. There was a reflection of a haggard overweight woman with sagging breasts that scared me silent. I was so thin in July almost skeletonlike--how could this medication zyprexa do this to me? I have faced this dilemma before in my 30's and the only thing that works is the Atkins diet but very strictly. We went to the second gambling casino in Rome, NY last night my brother and I. There was a lot of cigarette smoke and I only took $20 and left my wallet home. I started winning and at one point had $50 and was going to cash it in but prompted by my brother I lost it all. he lost about $80. I can't afford it and the smoke was really getting to me. I was glad to leave and come home and go to bed after a scary movie. The casino was huge and disgusted me really---it was sort of gross. Watching all these desperate people throw away their hard earned money just to win. I'd rather rent my house. It's a sure thing. I am a virgo and too practical to throw away money. The renters added a day so I get to put $750 on my credit card and when my seasonal tenant arrives and gives me $1200 Visa will get that too. I want drums but it will have to wait until I can use the porch to set them up. There is no room in the house right now. Buddha said wait that you do not need too much right now that it was better to have less. The debt and my weight loss is my focus. For years I have watched fat women and wondered how they got that way and I have my answer---carbs-sugar-alcohol. No exercise. Time to shower and read a bit of my book. I haven't had any free time to read. I miss my home. It will be good to get back. I have decided to stay sober for now because alcohol is carbs and it also drops the blood sugar. I can't risk that as it makes you eat. I hope you all are enjoying the holiday. We have NYRS coming up prolly with a pool table night here at the meadows ranch. Just as well to stay in. Dangerous out there. Much love and peace to all of you. I have learned how valuable my home is where it is quiet. I am very grateful for it. My truck wiper is fixed and I am halfway home......
Peace and Love
Tsunami-zen

Jack The Bear

Merry Xmas to all....last night watched an exceptional movie called Jack The Bear with Danny DeVito and many others. At one point he said that he was "Becoming The Monster" when his anger was getting out of control. It made me remember my anger and how sometimes it gets irrationally fierce at someone or something. And how a friend once tried to teach me to channel my anger as it was OK to have it but not to take it out on others. It is often hard to contain anger as sometimes it turns inward into depression and self-destruction. I've been angry lately because I gained so much weight from a medication. I don't like the winters cold so much so I go to the gym. But when I can't I tend to get a bit blue. Right now I have just come back from a bitterly damp cold walk w/the dogs. I did not want to go but I did anyway. I also noticed how much I enjoy people you can just BE with and have silence. I get annoyed with people who talk incessantly. I used to be the one who did it. Now I enjoy the quiet spaces between the words. Silence is golden...now I know what that means. I am still blogging from Syracuse and today we go to the family dinner. Then back to shoot some pool. Have a few cocktails. Opened our presents earlier. I got lotsa stuff. Lotsa Burts Bees stuff and wrinkle cream...lol. Went to a store called Vitamin Warehouse and got some cool shampoos and soaps. Haven't been able to see any drumsets yet. I guess the proper thing to do would be to pay off the visa first. Damn practicality!
I feel that drums will wake me up musically but I'm spoiled and wont use cheap ones or cheap cymbals. I abhor the medication I am on and am tapering some of it. I don't like the side effects.
I had bad nightmares last night but we were watching scary movies and eating dark chokky so mebbe that is what it twas. I miss my sofa. I called Victor and he went off about the FBI(paranoid schizo). I called Betty in the nursing home and she at least got prime rib today and didn't complain too much. I hope my friend Eric is having a nice Xmas and Carol. I wish Cloud Pop would talk to me but I fear he has just cut me out of his world forever. That hurts.
I would love to hear some jazz or blues tonite. Ya neva know?
Would like to see the new movie Ratatouille.......
Merry Xmas Everybuddy....
Sunamizen

Throw Momma From The Train

A.K.A. Oooooh That Smell....Can't ya Smell That Smell...the smell of mom's around you!
Well blogging from Syracuse the horoscope says I should be making a phone call to a man that I have had many good times with..Hmmmm......Does she or doesn't she? Let's first reflect on the visit to MOM'S HOUSE....as we pulled up and I gagged down my klonopin and a vodka soda I approached the door gingerly.....I knocked...no answer...maybe she had gone out....How do you spell relief? Then a voice from within...actually "A Cackle"....a dog barking and an opened door into what? Madness and squalor of course....the smell emanating from the abode was thick enough with stench to strangle an elephant...it twas human and dog pee....rotting filth in the sink plus more....I entered and in front of me was a hunched over old woman with no teeth screaming at her dog and reeking of human urine. Hmmmm.....hug or no hug.....hug. The first day didnt go as bad as we took her out to eat and boosted her and her cane into the truck w/a cement block and took her to a gambling casino in Mt Airy PA. I was too scared to lose my $20 so I kept cashing in. My bro made $100. We left and brought her out to eat ice cream late and food. She did not sleep that night but I did. My brother slept a few hrs. On the sofa. In the stench. In the a.m. we went for brekkie and then errands to buy mom a coat and socks. She started getting gnarly as she was breaking in a new pair of Army Boot like shoes and has bad arthritis. She walked like a crab. She has a cane. It was tough guiding her through places trying to protect her and others. She got really gnarly then and started picking on me then my brother when he left the vicinity. Dysfunction Junction. I bit my tongue as Gramma would say. I had a drink when we were out and another klonopin. To bite my tongue better. We made it back to her home after a few remarks uttered from her mouth started bothering me. I wont elaborate. It was sexual about men and then about alcohol. My mom lacks what can I say CLASS? We made it to a pizza place where she proceeded to take off her shoes and socks and exposed red feet with a wound for all to see. OMG. We ate pizza and got her home where she started erupting about us stealing her stuff and moving it. We had only tried to clean up and around the filth. She started crying and calling me names so I had another drink. To bite my shredded tongue a bit more. We opened her presents and attempted to vacuum the dog and the sofa. It did not go over well. So here I am back in Syracuse fat and screwed up on the atkins diet. How can you diet with your family on vacation anyway? They eat fast food and out mostly. Tonight Xmas eve is stew and fresh bread and pool on my bros new pool table and wine. Xmas will be presents and dinner at my brothers wifes family. I could pass that up but as always I will go. Then after that back here for fun and games w/the 3 dogs. I have renters arriving 12/28 who sent me a personal check instead of money orders. I will attempt to cash them wed. and if they dont cash the door to my home WILL be locked by a friend. I told them money orders. Will be back 1/1 pm to survey the wreckage and maybe increase the homeowners ins. as I have another renter coming in 1/2. I don't like being fat again. It makes me feel extremely unlovable. Unloved by myself. Screw others. I'm celibate one year and over one month. That part of me is on hold. Until I can see my feet.
Be Good Kiddies
Have A Great Xmas Mornin'
Tsunami

Two Heads Are Better Than One

"Change is created by those whose imaginations are bigger than their circumstances." Unknown

4 BOYFRIENDS - VERY TOUCHING STORY .....from Whisperwindspirit

Once upon a time there was this girl who had four boyfriends.

She loved the 4th boyfriend the most and adorned him with rich robes and treated him to the finest of delicacies. She gave him nothing but the best.

She also loved the 3rd boyfriend very much and was always showing him off to neighboring kingdoms. However, she feared that one day he would leave her for another.

She also loved her 2nd boyfriend. He was her confidant and was always kind, considerate and patient with her. Whenever this girl faced a problem, she could confide in him, and he would help her get through the difficult times.

The girls 1st boyfriend was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining her wealth and kingdom. However, she did not love the first boyfriend. Although he loved her deeply, she hardly took notice of him.

One day, the girl fell ill and she knew her time was short. She thought of her luxurious life and wondered, I now have four boyfriends with me, but when I die, I'll be all alone.'

Thus, she asked the 4th boyfriend, I loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?'
'No way!', replied the 4th boyfriend, and he walked away without another word.
His answer cut like a sharp knife right into her heart.

The sad girl then asked the 3rd boyfriend, 'I loved you all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?' 'No ! ', replied the 3rd boyfriend. 'Life is too good! When you die, I'm going to marry someone else!' Her heart sank and turned cold.

She then asked the 2nd boyfriend, 'I have always turned to you for help and you've always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?'

'I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!', replied the 2nd boyfriend. 'At the very most, I can only walk with you to your grave.'

His answer struck her like a bolt of lightning, and the girl was devastated.
Then a voice called out: 'I'll go with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go.'
The girl looked up, and there was her first boyfriend. He was very skinny as he suffered from malnutrition and neglect. Greatly grieved, the girl said, 'I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!'

In truth, you have 4 boyfriends in your lives:
Your 4th boyfriend is your body. No matter how much time and effort you lavish in making it look good, it will leave you when you die.

Your 3rd boyfriend is your possessions, status and wealth. When you die, it will all go to others.

Your 2nd boyfriend is your family and friends. No matter how much they have been there for you, the furthest they can stay by you is up to the grave.

And your 1st boyfriend is your Soul. Often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power and pleasures of the world. However, your Soul is the only thing that will follow you wherever you go. Cultivate, strengthen and cherish it now, for it is the only part of you that will follow you to the throne of God and continue with you throughout Eternity.

Thought for the day: Remember, when the world pushes you to your knees, you're in the perfect position to pray.

Pass this on to someone you care about - I just did.

Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect. It means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections.

I Am Nervous Yet Excited To Share My Home With 4 People From Miami/NY....

I have four strangers coming to rent my hovel..and a man on his way to check my spare room out. He should be here in an hour and then I am going to bed. The house is almost all set aside from a quick vacuum and wet mop. The car is packed and the food is made. An adventure for sure with a broken windshield wiper. My brother will fix but it could be a harrowing drive. I have to put in oil as it says I have none. Harumph. I wish I had a copilot. One in particular.
He knows his name...... He is my favorite copilot. Well my eyes hurt so I will close and wish everyone a very hoppy Xmas and a very hoppier NYR.
Love and Happiness.....
Tsunami

A Special Merry Xmas To Baldy....

Greetings From The White House....

LOVE PEOPLE AND USE THINGS - NOT LOVE THINGS AND USE PEOPLE

Breakfast at McDonald's

This is a good story and is true, please read it all the way through until the end!

I am a mother of three (ages 14, 12, 3) and have recently completed my college degree. The last class I had to take was Sociology. The teacher was absolutely inspiring with the qualities that I wish every human being had been graced with. Her last project of the term was called, "Smile."

The class was asked to go out and smile at three people and document their reactions. I am a very friendly person and always smile at everyone and say hello anyway. So, I thought this would be a piece of cake, literally. Soon after we were assigned the project, my husband, youngest son, and I went out to McDonald's one crisp March morning. It was just our way of sharing special playtime with our son.

We were standing in line, waiting to be served, when all of a sudden everyone around us began to back away, and then even my husband did. I did not move an inch... an overwhelming feeling of panic welled up inside of me as I turned to see why they had moved. As I turned around I smelled a horrible "dirty body" smell, and there standing behind me were two poor homeless men. As I looked down at the short gentleman, close to me, he was "smiling". His beautiful sky blue eyes were full of God's Light as he searched for acceptance. He said, "Good day" as he counted the few coins he had been clutching. The second man fumbled with his hands as he stood behind his friend. I realized the second man was mentally challenged and the blue-eyed gentleman was his salvation.

I held my tears as I stood there with them. The young lady at the counter asked him what they wanted. He said, "Coffee is all Miss" because that was all they could afford. (If they wanted to sit in the restaurant and warm up, they had to buy something. He just wanted to be warm). Then I really felt it - the compulsion was so great I almost reached out and embraced the little man with the blue eyes. That is when I noticed all eyes in the restaurant were set on me, judging my every action. I smiled and asked the young lady behind the counter to give me two more breakfast meals on a separate tray.

I then walked around the corner to the table that the men had chosen as a resting spot. I put the tray on the table and laid my hand on the blue-eyed gentleman's cold hand. He looked up at me, with tears in his eyes, and said, "Thank you." I leaned over, began to pat his hand and said, "I did not do this for you. God is here working through me to give you hope."I started to cry as I walked away to join my husband and son. When I sat down my husband smiled at me and said, "That is why God gave you to me, Honey, to give me hope." We held hands for a moment and at that time, we knew that only because of the Grace that we had been given were we able to give.

We are not church goers, but we are believers. That day showed me the pure Light of God's sweet love. I returned to college, on the last evening of class, with this story in hand. I turned in "my project" and the instructor read it. Then she looked up at me and said, "Can I share this?" I slowly nodded as she got the attention of the class. She began to read and that is when I knew that we as human beings and being part of God share this need to heal people and to be healed. In my own way I had touched the people at McDonald's, my son, instructor, and every soul that shared the classroom on the last night I spent as a college student.I graduated with one of the biggest lessons I would ever learn:UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE.

Much love and compassion is sent to each and every person who may read this and learn how to LOVE PEOPLE AND USE THINGS - NOT LOVE THINGS AND USE PEOPLE. Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart. To handle yourself, use your head. To handle others, use your heart.

Personal Thursday Scope....Hmmmmmmmm

Make a list of everyone you really want to mend fences with, and devote the day to doing just that. Forget about what you said and why you said it, and vice versa. Think about what you miss, why you miss it and how just one short conversation can fix it all.

Life Is Not Waiting For The Storm To Pass...

It's Learning To Dance In The Rain

Why Do Women Always Stress More When They've Gained Weight?

I think it is because we have been "programmed" to look desirable to men and to live up to what the media shows as sexy. I see obese women everywhere and i can't say that I don't find it disgusting but I don't judge them I just wonder how they could let themselves go. Thirty lbs and I am in literal "deer in headlight" shock. I don't like feeling a jelly belly nor do I want to gross out anyone of the opposite sex if i ever take my clothes off again. I just got rids of my ex roommate and it is evident that I AM his life so I am going to have to call social services in am and let them know I have rented my room so it is NOT an option. I am feeling claustrophobic having him a mile away. I like my privacy. I just tried to help but now I am IT...tag. I have to back out of his life somehow but I don't think it will be possible unless they move him out of state.
All the nutz love me........Vic does so much for me shovelling and doing whatever is needed........I feel awful.......he drives everyone batty
at least I know this so I know it's not me being mean.....
Therapy in a.m........
I'll need it......
Squashymoto

OMG Thank You Buddha

I have rented NYRS for $750 and have gotten a man to rent the remainder of the ski sseason in the spare room for like $1400 and he only comes up some midweeks and an occ weekend....
Oh thank you buddha......VISA thanks you!
I love yew....thank you for suggesting I read The Mtn Times.....
Love Suzy

Mother Of the Skye

Pending Posting By Newspaper

Victor Victrola And I Cleaned A House Today.....

Boy it sure goes faster with two. We're having a toddy and shoveling snow out of the truck bed and driveway, garage and entry. He'll sleep good. I am readying the house for renters. I better pack tonight. He ate all 12 corn muffins I baked him last night. Next goes the banana bread.
I figure I should spend some time with him before I go for 10 days. I hope the next snowstorm dn make my trip impossible. I may have to leave on the 20th. Got Absolut mandarin for the holiday as my bro said he'd have a drink or three when we go see my mom. My sweats are falling off so I must be losing inches. Fat to muscle. The spare oom is done and the bed freshly made. I have to wait to do my room and lay out the sofa and air mattress linens. I wish I could just do it all and get it over with but it has to wait. I am bringing some exercise equipment so I can work out while my bro and his wife are at work. Snowshoes too. I looked in a mirror as I was cleaning and I was all wrinkly...maybe I'm turning Japanese. Proona Baboona From Foona Loona-name of my kids book and a silly sentence from my childhood.
The doc faxed a letter to PATH so that Victor could get cash in his foodstamp card today.
I had remembered to call him. So friday Vic should have an EBT card. Then he can take the bus and get vino which he is dying for. He wants the big cardboard vat. I'm not buying it for him.
Aren't you glad your tax diollars are paying for a nut to drink? Lol. That's the way it is folks.
My meds feel very sedating lately and I'm losing my zip so I will post the NEW mother of the skye horoscopes as they are really good......
Be Good While I'm Gone......
Gunshee

Dream Drumz

Sweet Goodnight

Goodnight And Sweet Dreams to all I love....
One Day At A Time To Regain Equilibrium...
Too Many Distractions Of Late......
Love Is All There Is.....
Tsunami

The Pearl Exports In Syracuse

I'm Drooling Now.....

There Is A Daddy's Junkie Music Store Where I Am Going...

Daddy's Syracuse Store Hours:

Mon-Fri 11-8

Sat 10-6

Sun 12-6

Address:2413 Brewerton Rd Mattydale, NY 13211

315-454-9625

Store Manager:Jeff Schuldt

The Syracuse Story

This store is located in Mattydale, right near the airport and full of the kind of gear that greater Syracuse musicians are looking for. Located right next to Big Lots on Brewerton Road, Daddy's Syracuse has hundreds of great guitars from Fender, Gibson, Ibanez, Peavey and Alvarez along with best in amplifiers (Peavey, Fender, Ibanez, Marshall, Line 6). Add to this heady mixture, the most popular brands of drums, PA, keyboards and recording, you've got a musical wonderland that you've got to vist.

Good Bye Eric

Friends come and go. Eric and I have spent some really valuable time together...... mostly drinking. He and I just clash but at other times find love. I choose to be alone for my own haunting reasons. He is getting nothing from US. He taught me that Great Sex was not always love although i do love great sex. There has to be an equal pulling together spiritually and sexually. I could not find the way to him sexually and he could not find the way to me. Walls...hangups...ego...power trips. Resentment. We came a long way. I will still grow w/out his presence well maybe not drumming but maybe yes. Around him I could really drum.
And we sang and scatted and made love on the lawn when it was good. Something always reared its ugly head in both of us however so we both need to heal and learn more about relationships and responsibility. Nobody knows it all. I will miss my best friend.
He knows me more than anyone.
Tearfully,
Sunami-zenje

Disgusted and Disgusting

Been on a strict diet for 10 days and I weighed myself-I gained a pound. I have been going to the gym daily and snowshoeing. yeah I know muscle weighs more than fat. Facing a 10 day family visit with people who eat everything.....being fit means being healthy...fat is not fit. I don't like losing control......
Disgusted and Disgusting

Why Do I Take Care Of Everbuddy Else Before Me?

Today I realized I had to take care of the dog and Victor before I could eat my only meal.
a can of corn with butter. Limited food supply. I need to stretch whats left on Atkins til friday and then make food to travel with. I hit the gym but was NOT into it today. I did the bike and the machines. Too much on my mind. Spent another day getting Victor to appts so he could get housing and food stamps and assistance. I got him food stamps and am working on the cash w/his doctor. He needs to fax a letter stating Vic can't work be4 they give him cash. I had not eaten all day as I overslept and his appt was at 1 so I am weary. Tommorrow is house cleaning in Killington and getting the snow out of the back of the truck and the wood, shovelling the entire entry for the renters and changing all the linens and finding some for the sofa and an air mattress. I will do the twin bedroom tonight and wrap two more presents. Today the house was shown. Boy the corn did not fill me up but thats life. I have to call the neighbor now to arrange for him to check on the house while the renters are here. Oops he just declined he thinks he will be liable in some way. Guess I'm going it alone. Time to wrap more presents and maybe relax? I got another book by Eckhart Tolle called Stillness Speaks. The only time I'm still is when I'm sleeping. I love that time. I've given up hope on Cloud Pop coming home. It's about thyme. He's been gone a year. His loss.
Much Love
Merry Xmas
Love Sunami

Lost Puppy

My neighbor has lost her Chihuahua and is desperate to find him.
She does a lot of traveling and always takes her dog with her. Yesterday, she was sitting on the couch watching TV. She called out for her puppy with no response, and the back door was open. She has been putting up signs everywhere. If you see this dog, please let me know and I will notify her.
Your help would be greatly appreciated.

Desire, Ask, Believe, Receive.....

Victor is finely esconced in his Econolodge suite.....my renters called and they are coming.....Yay!I'm cleaning like a maniac as the place has to be guest arrival stripped and all linens fresh. I will make $750 for 5 nights. I will pay the neighbor to check on them $50 if he will take it. In the a.m. is my interview w/CH5 about house swapping. I met w/both docs today at the hospital and they took up a collection for $10 gas money for the chevy. I got food at BROC for Vic and out of my fridge. I will whip up some sketti and mac and cheese and I already gave him the dark meat turkey I had frozen. My disability check went up a tad and I will have food stamps when I return. The fridge has to be empty by friday but it almost is. So exciting. I worked out. Made Carol and I grilled pork chops, spinach feta salad and shrimp scampi w/a basil cream sauce. Yummy!
I'm putting all in the attic:food, clutter. Clothing. I have 4 days to get this place shining in between the gym and appts. My shrink wants me thursday be4 I go. I got my meds refilled and picked them up. I'll need a vat "o" vodka w/an I.V. drip for da trip. Presents are wrapped as they come in. Vic got his box from my family. He can open then 12/25 or the day I leave. I know it will be hard for him to have me away but I can call him. I bought new incense and wrinkle cream for my eye bags. All is getting in order. if this swap works I'll do another to pay off the "Dreaded Visa". I am hippy happy hoppy. Bills are paid ahead and the truck is running gewt.
OCD Cleaner

A Winter Statistic

98% OF ALL AMERICANS SAY "OH SH*T" BEFORE GOING IN THE DITCH ON A SLIPPERY ROAD..
THE OTHER 2% ARE FROM VERMONT AND THEY SAY....
"HOLD MY BEER AND WATCH THIS"

Today's the Day Victor Moves Out....

Time to cut the cord and have Vic live alone in Econolodge. The truck had a hard time starting so I hope that is not going to act up if I shut it off in this weather. His stuff is all piled up and I'm headed the the PO for his xmas gifts from my family. Haven't heard from my renters yet. Sold The Packard for Carol after selling the wheelchair van. I'm batting 1,000. Maybe I'll get a jazz tape of Bobs. He had tons. Hope this unit is NOT on the second floor as there is alot of STUFF....
Later
The Moving Lady

The Music Never Ends...

The Very Thought Of You

Tony Bennett The Icon Of Jazz

BTW Anonymous Poster....

"If you are going to use my blog to judge me, then go away and stop reading it".
The four agreements say not to judge so re-read the bewk.
Susan Ellen Princess Meadows Wind
Mendon, VT

In Betwixt All This Drama.......Peace

As I was sitting at my desk working today, listening to Christmas music in the background, "Do You Hear What I Hear" came on. At first, I was just barely listening, then one stanza in particular got my attention:

Said the King to the people everywhere,
"Listen to what I say!Pray for peace, people, everywhere.Listen to what I say!The Child, the Child, sleeping in the night,He will bring us goodness and light.He will bring us goodness and light."

A thought occurred to me regarding there being strength in numbers, and I was reminded of this Bible verse: For where two or more are gathered together in my name, there I am in the midst of them. Matthew 18:20

With that in mind, this is what I want for Christmas - I want everyone who reads this to take just one minute on Christmas Eve to pray for Peace, at, say, 5pm. Just one minute, that's all it will take, to pray for Peace. Even if you don't remember to do it at 5pm, do it sometime on Christmas Eve.If each one of you passes this on to just 3 more people, and they each pass it on to 3 more people, by the time Christmas Eve arrives, there could be millions of people praying for Peace at or around the same time. Do the math - the potential expands almost infinitely. (if it goes forward just 10 rounds, from the original group to whom I sent it, almost 1.5 million - yes MILLION - people will have received this!) Imagine how powerful it can be!All it takes is a minute, and a "mustard seed of faith."

Peace and Love to you all, and may God Bless you and keep you.
Merry Christmas!

Arnold Is Watching Ewe.....

ANONYMOUS POSTS DISALLOWED

IF YOU HAVEN'T GOT THE BALLS TO SIGN YOUR NAME, GET LOST.
I DON'T MIND COMMENTS BUT I'D LIKE TO KNOW WHO YOU ARE SO I DON'T MAKE A MISTAKE IN ASSUMING/CONTACTING OR REPLYING TO THE COMMENT.

Can You Say Blizzard Today In Vermont??

What Is A Blizzard
There are really two different meanings for the word "blizzard". "Blizzard conditions" occur when strong winds (at least 35 mph) combine with either falling snow or snow on the ground to reduce visibilities to 1/4 mile or less for at least three hours. According to this definition, blizzard conditions can occur without falling snow....it's severe blowing snow. The other meaning of "blizzard" is a strong winter cyclone event combined with high winds that cause alot of blowing and drifting of snow. It would be difficult for people to agree on the "worst blizzard" ever experienced, since so many factors are involved: how much snow, how strong the winds were, how large an area was influenced, was a major city involved, how long did it last, etc.

Interesting facts:
STUCK BETWEEN HIGH AND LOW PRESSURE

Blizzard winds are created when a strong low pressure area is close to a strong high pressure area. The air "wants" to flow from high pressure to low pressure, but the turning of the Earth causes the air to turn to the right (in the Northern Hemisphere), and the wind ends up flowing around the low pressure area, rather than directly toward it.

How It Is,,,,

Thought For The Day

The Real McCoy

Brrrrrrrrrrr

Prayer For Today

Todays World Of Technology Overthrown

Cell phones - New Law

According to a proposed new law that would go into effect Jan 1, 2008 you will no longer be able to use a cell phone while driving unless you have a 'hands free' adapter. I went to Circuit City and they wanted $50 for a headset with a microphone for my cell phone. Having a friend in the cell phone business, I talked with him and was able to come up with an alternative, working through Office Depot. These kits are compatible with any mobil e phone and one size fits all. I paid him $0.08 each because he bought in quantity. Then we tried it with Motorola, Sprint, Verizon and Nokia units and they worked perfectly. A photo is shown above so take a look and let me know if you want one.

Christmas At Arlington

We Should All Do More For Others!

I'm not into war but they had to be.

Rest easy, sleep well my brothers. Know the line has held, your job is done. Rest easy, sleep well. Others have taken up where you fell, the line has held. Peace, peace, and farewell...

CHRISTMAS AT ARLINGTON CEMETERY

I wonder why the press hasn't enlightened the public about it?
Readers may be interested to know that these wreaths -- some 5,000 -- are donated by the Worcester Wreath Co. of Harrington, Maine. The owner, Merrill Worcester, not only provides the wreaths, but covers the trucking expense as well. He's done this since 1992. A wonderful guy. Also, most years, groups of Maine school kids combine an educational trip to DC with this event to help out. Making this even more remarkable is the fact that Harrington is in one the poorest parts of the state. You hear too much about the bad things people do.

Warning: Do Not Attempt To....

TAKE MY JOY!

Illustration Of The Green Eyed Monster

Today

Visited a suicidally depressed obese woman who just had the zipper knee surgery today. It was hard to hug her and let her cry on me but I tried to get her to be positive. I will continue to act as a liason between her doctor and herself as she has no family or friends. I may be in over my head but i can walk and do everything I want and she can't. She needs a cheering section and I am that. I see her once a week and will continue to try to work my magic.
I refuse to be brought down by negativity or criticism from peers however.
Wonder Woman

God Forbid

God forbid he do anything for anyone else that takes him outside his self made box.
I call that self-centered and selfish. He calls my helping others ego stroking. I call it love.
Susan

CH5 TV Is Interwiewing And Filming Me Wednesday For A Show On Housing Swaps

I'm So Excited!!!!

Burned A Sage Stick I Grew To Cleanse My Home Of Evil Spirits

The Smudging Ceremony By Adrienne Borden and Steve Coyote

Our Native elders have taught us that before a person can be healed or heal another, one must be cleansed of any bad feelings, negative thoughts, bad spirits or negative energy - cleansed both physically and spiritually. This helps the healing to come through in a clear way, without being distorted or sidetracked by negative "stuff" in either the healer or the client. The elders say that all ceremonies, tribal or private, must be entered into with a good heart so that we can pray, sing, and walk in a sacred manner, and be helped by the spirits to enter the sacred realm. Native people throughout the world use herbs to accomplish this. One common ceremony is to burn certain herbs, take the smoke in one's hands and rub or brush it over the body. Today this is commonly called "smudging." In Western North America the three plants most frequently used in smudging are sage, cedar, and sweetgrass.

Sage
There are many varieties of sage, and most have been used in smudging. The botanical name for "true" sage is Salvia (e.g. Salvia officinalis, Garden Sage, or Salvia apiana, White Sage). It is interesting to note that Salvia comes from the Latin root salvare, which means "to heal." There are also varieties of sage which are of a species separate from Salvin Artemusia. Included here are sagebrush (e.g. Artemisia californica) and mugwort (Artemisia vulgaris). We have seen both Salvia and Artemisia sub-species used in smudging. Sage is burned in smudging ceremonies to drive out bad spirits, feelings, or influences, and also to keep bad spirits from entering the area where a ceremony takes place. In Plains nations, the floor of the sweat lodge is frequently covered with sage, and participants rub the leaves on their bodies while in the sweat. Sage is also commonly spread on the ground in a lodge or on an altar where the pipe touches the earth. Some nations wrap their pipes in sage when they are placed in pipe-bundles, as sage purifies objects wrapped in it. Sage wreaths are also placed around the head and wrists of Sundancers.

Cedar
There is some potential confusion here about the terms used to name plants, mainly because in some areas, junipers are known as "cedar" - as in the case of Desert White Cedar (Juniperus monosperina). This doesn't mean that J. monosperina wasn't used as a cleansing herb, though; in the Eastern U.S., its relative, Eastern Red Cedar (Juniperus virginia), was used ceremonially. However, in the smudging ceremonies we have seen or conducted ourselves, Western Red Cedar (Thuja occidentalis) and California Cedar Incense (Libocedrus descurrens) were used ... not varieties of juniper. Cedar is burned while praying either aloud or silently. The prayers rise on the cedar smoke and are carried to the Creator. Cedar is also spread along with sage on the floor of the sweat lodges of some tribes. Cedar branches are brushed in the air to cleanse a home during the House Blessing Ceremony of many Northwest Indian nations. In the Pacific Northwest, the people burn cedar for purification in much the same way as sage - it drives out negative energy; but it also brings in good influences. The spirit of cedar is considered very ancient and wise by Pacific Northwest tribes, and old, downed cedar trees are honored with offerings and prayers.

Sweetgrass
One of the most sacred plants for the Plains Indians, sweetgrass is a tall wild grass with a reddish bas and perfume-like, musty odor. It grows mainly on the eastern side of the Rockies in Montana and adjacent Alberta, Canada. It also shows up in some small areas of Wyoming and South Dakota. Its botanical name is Hierochloe odorata. Some common names for it are Seneca grass, holy grass and vanilla grass. We have been told that a variety of vanilla grass grows in North Central California. But, how similar it is to the Plains variety we don't know. On the Plains, sweetgrass is usually braided together in bunches as a person's hair is braided, although friends have said they have seen it simply bunched and wrapped in cloth. Either way, it is usually burned by shaving little bits over hot coals or lighting the end and waving it around, letting the smoke spread through the air. This latter method is how we were taught to burn sweetgrass in the sweat lodge - allowing the purifying smoke to get to all parts of the lodge. We were taught that it was good to burn sweetgrass after the sage or cedar had driven out the bad influences. Sweetgrass brings in the good spirits and the good influences. As with cedar, burning sweetgrass while praying sends prayers up to the Creator in the smoke. High Hollow Horn says in the The Sacred Pipe "This smoke from the sweetgrass will rise up to you, and will spread throughout the universe. Its fragrance will be known by the wingeds, the four-leggeds, and the two leggeds, for we understand that we are all relatives; may all our brothers be tame and not fear us!" Sweetgrass is also put in pipe bundles and medicine bundles along with sage to purify and protect sacred objects. Sweetgrass is very rare today, its territory severely cut by development, cattle-grazing, and wheat fields - and tradition Indians in the northern Plains are trying to protect the last remaining fields. The best way for most folks to get sweetgrass is to buy it at Native American retail outlets. This gives support to Indians who can help the fields from being depleted.

Smudging
To do a smudging ceremony, burn the clippings of these herbs (dried), rub your hands in the smoke, and then gather the smoke and bring it into your body, or - rub it onto yourself; especially onto any area you feel needs spiritual healing. Keep praying all the while that the unseen powers of the plant will cleanse your spirit. Sometimes, one person will smudge another, or a group of people, using hands - or more often a feather - to lightly brush the smoke over the other person(s). We were taught to look for dark spots in a person's spirit-body. As one California Indian woman told us, she "sees" a person's spirit-body glowing around them, and where there are "dark or foggy parts," she brushes the smoke into these "holes in their spirit-body." This helps to heal the spirit and to "close up" these holes. Recently we did a "light" house cleansing for a friend. We use the term "light", for this is a relatively simple ceremony as opposed to some that are more lengthy and complicated. Our friend had some serious emotional and relationship problems, and he felt they had left a heavy and dark atmosphere. First, we prayed together to the Creator and to the spirits for help. We then, burned sage, purified ourselves, and took the sage to all the corners, closets, and rooms of the house. We pushed the smoke with our hands to cleanse every bit of space - lingering over dark or cold spots that "felt" uncomfortable. We used sage first in order to drive out the bad influences. Then we purified ourselves with cedar and, then repeated the cleansing process throughout the house with that. Then sweetgrass was used in the same manner to bring in good influences. All the time we prayed for help in this cleansing. Finally, we took a candle over the whole house and pushed its light into every corner. The People of the Pacific Northwest Coast taught this "lighting-up" of a house to us. We've been doing this type of house cleansing for ten years, and it never fails to "clear the air." One more note about smudging. It is very popular among many novices to use abalone shells in smudging. There are many Native elders who are pleased to see so many new folds smudging themselves, but - some are concerned that abalone shells are being used when burning the herbs. On the Pacific Northwest Coast, for example, some holy men have said that abalone shells represent Grandmother Ocean, and that they should be used in ceremonies with water, not burning. We know enough Native elders in the Northwest, the Plains, and California who don't use abalone shells - but instead clay or stone bowls - that we don't personally feel comfortable using a shell. In any case, smudging is a ceremony that must be done with care. We are entering into a relationship with the unseen powers of these plants, and with the spirits of the ceremony. As with all good relationships, there has to be respect and honor if the relationship is to work.--Adrienne Borden is of Chippewa heritage, and Steve Coyote is of Cheyenne background.

Did You Know........

A lightening bolt is hotter than the surface of the sun!

I Want To Take The Ramp!

You are speeding along in your vehicle and suddenly there is a huge ramp in front of you, Suzy. You have the choice of avoiding the ramp, staying on the ground where you know that it is safe and clear, and being content with a very limited view of the world. Another choice, however, is to hit that ramp head-on and let it send you soaring up over the trees and beyond. Who knows where you might land? There is an incredible adventure waiting for you when you take that leap into the unknown.

I'm feeling unattractive and weatherbeaten lately. I shot two games of pool last night and won both so I am still the little sharkette. The band was good but I need horns. Might be seeing a Horny band tonight. Spoke to the Doc about Victor today and I will be picking him up at the hospital and checking him into the Mendon Econolodge where he can live paid for by the state as long as he goes to his meetings. Takes his meds. He has a big box of presents at the post office.

My family is nice. I get to take a bath in his bathtub at the motel....yay!! Today I visit Betty in the nursing home to play scrabble and Vic at the hospital and then return some sox that were irregulars (which I don't mind) but they have BIG GAPING HOLES IN THEM! Thats beyond irregular. I'm on my 3rd tiny pot of coffee and will most likely see Joey Leone and The Chop Shop tonight w/my buddy Carol. She dumped a guy last night who lacked vivacity and emotion. You go girl! He was negative and doom and gloomy. We need guys that talk about stuff. That can talk to us no matter what it is.

I've given up......I'm too gunshy. I just hang w/dawgs. Fifty one is a weird age. You still feel 35 but you look 45. Wrinkles are there. Weight is harder to lose. I did lose my appetite though. the atkins diet will do that. I must go to the gym before anything to work out. It helps my brain.

Nothing spiritual to say I'm just living in the now. Lamb Chops for dinner and salad for lunch.

I hope I haven't become "boring". The winter leaves me cold and dreaming of flowers. This summer will be my best garden. I am well. I am eager to grow stuff. I have beets growing in the kitchen. I'm renting the garage to a guy w/a car for $50per month. I'm hoping this Xmas/Nyrs rental goes through. I need the cash. I think they wanted to swap but I can't go to Miami right now. Too much on mah plate.....

Have a Good Day Peoples.......my tummy is grumbling at me to feed it but I am starving it.

Looks like my mothering urge has transmutated to taking care of Victor. Somebody has to.

It might as well be me......

I gotta be me............

Abby Normal