On The Road To Financial Ruin

Of late it has been illustrated to me the constant deluge of bullshit falling upon the human race.
In my questo for health(which is not going so well) I am being bombarded not only with physical non-stop torment but with crises of all proportions threatening my sanity and equilibrium.
I have tried so hard and maintained sobriety at all costs but I see why people drink.
Is life just an endless incessant peckering of your spirit with human suffering and trails and tribulatiosn and stress. What happens when you have no money after working so hard for so many years. Desperately clinging to your home like a cat getting a bath will claw at your arm.
Venus just got a bath in the sink so I know. Having to depend on your friends for help..feeling so needy and helpless. Unable to stop your body from allergic reactions that wrack it on a daily basis for months at a time. Unable to join other people at this time due to strong scent senstivities. The truck breaks down...thinking it a simple fuel filter and then getting THE CALL. Fuel pump silly. Ka-ching. Bathroom renovations monday.......kaching.....dental bioavailability blood test---kaching.......filling........kaching.......gas for truck.....kaching......insurance.....kaching.....
natural supplements.....kaching.....how about
I CAN'T CHING ANYMORE!! Thank you very much. What do I do? Sell my truck and go vehicleless. I can't. MCS people need transportation and I can't take a bus because of the diesel fumes. They can't find me help because of my fragrance sensitivities. There is no help for people w/MCS I'm afraid. It is a very un-understood illness. I hate it. I am hating my life right now. I have to be honest. This is my blog.
My piano was moved to the porch so I could keep it yet have it out of the living space.
I'm happy about that. Whine-whime-whine. Under all that shit I thought there was supposed to be a pony.
Love and Peace...
Enough Already God..haven't I been doing a good enough job?
I guess knot. Is this a test of my sobriety?? Me guesses.
Sunami